The selfishness of suicide

As a child of suicide I’ve spent a life counseling people off the edge of that cliff.

I’ve written about it, talked about it, and received countless letters from people who say I’ve made the difference and saved their lives. I’ve had a compassionate heart for depression and suffering.

Yet today, it changed.
Today I’m still compassionate but I see a different side of things.

Early this morning I decided to write about the story of the millionaire executive who decided life wasn’t worth living. He drove his car intentionally into traffic and killed a beautiful, pregnant young girl and her fiancé, a loving father of three. The executive who wanted to kill himself lived.

I saw a photo of Jason Timmons, with his little girl. She reminded me of me, a child left behind. But Jason was killed when Robert Dellinger plowed into him in his SUV as he tried to kill himself. Suicide is so selfish. Everyone who ever said that to me I argued with. But, maybe they’re right. As humans, we all have ups and downs. I work with hundreds every year in my life skills program with real loss and tragedy. Mercedes Ramirez, survived an airplane crash. I was a crisis management worker there. Hundreds died including her parents. Others added losses unimaginable. Mercedes is helping others, talking about healing and recovery.

Then this afternoon, I read this. About the
Little girl who died when a woman bent on suicide drove her car into a restaurant. Tragic.

Humans are either resilient or not. It’s a choice. Today I choose to look forward, help others, and survive the toughest moments in life.


One thought on “The selfishness of suicide

  1. I have had two family members to take their own lives one I didn’t know and the other I talked to on the phone just a few days before he ended his life. He had loss his wife of 46 years and I had loss my husband of almost forty years just a few months apart. I knew first hand what kind of pain his heart was in how lost he was how his life as he had known for 46 years had all of a sudden changed. He never said anything that I have not said myself. knowing that we had a tough road ahead of us I would tell him that we had to be thankful for all the years that God had giving us our love one’s and that we had to look at the good and not just the bad. But for some reason he could not see passed his own pain I think the pain was just more than he could bare. I sat at his funeral and looking around at his children and grand children I kept thinking if only he could see the pain in his family faces and the tears. I think he was just suffering from so much pain and knew he would never be happy again. Was that selfish? For his family I think so! But thank God he didn’t take anyone else with him. But to hurt or take someone else life away is a total act of evil.


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